Loose Ends

I said about a week and a half ago that I was going to post a vlog. Then our computer with the webcam had to go to the doctor and we just got it back. I could've used my iPhone, but, meh. I will work on it soon.

McKinley is growing and talking and running and I am having so much fun with her. She is truly the light of my life. She is still nursing, and as my grandma says, it provides her more "soul food" than nutrition at this point, although I believe she's still reaping the benefits of nursing.

I never thought that we would still be going strong. Honestly, when I received the samples of formula in the mail during my pregnancy, I held on to them. I wasn't committed to breastfeeding past 6 months until she was born and we developed a great nursing relationship. I know that we were very fortunate to not have any bumps in the road. While I would have cut anything out of my diet for her, I'm not sure we would have lasted past 12 months if I would have had a super restricted diet.

Now, I feel very emotional about the thought of her weaning. Some days, I think I'm ready. Other days, I think of how she is likely the only baby I will ever nurse, and then I don't want to even think about stopping.

It was not my intention for this post to just be about our nursing relationship. But now I have to go, and, um. Sorry.

Oh, I had a dream last night that it was time for the Spring Time Change again and it stayed light out until 6pm instead of 5pm. So if we could just go ahead and make that happen right now, that'd be great.

Here.

My to-do list is long. Bedding needs washed, floors need swept, the bathrooms need cleaned, someone should buy some groceries, and my baby needs to have her baby clothes switched out for toddler clothes. Of course, the clothes swapping is my favorite and least favorite of my chores to do. My favorite because I love to introduce new, cute clothes to her wardrobe, and the least favorite because my baby isn't such a baby. When I consider that she could be an only child, I find myself hanging on to every stage a little bit longer than she does.

Oh, the dishwasher needs unloaded and reloaded, and the previous load that is drying on the counter needs put away. And the crockpot sitting off to the side of the sink has a ring of leftover (burnt) chili that I just can't scrub away. The counter must feel overwhelmed just like I do.

But as I was listening to the Today Show yesterday, while nursing McKinley in our special chair, I heard Hoda (or Kathie Lee, not sure) say "Be Here Now". Whatever you're doing, whoever you're with, Be Here Now. So, I let that sit all day, in my mind and on my heart.

I played some dolls and read a couple of books, and had extra tickle time. And it was hard, but I put my phone down.

I'm going to print out some signs and hang them around my house. I might get all fancy and pinterest-y and make them look pretty, or I might print them out in Comic Sans* and just hang them. The sign isn't important - the words are.

Be Here Now.

*I would never.

Back at it.

I wonder how long I can do this. Up every hour, maybe two, through the night. The squeaky glider. Closing the door behind me, then opening to double check on her.

I’m tired. I know that parents are supposed to be tired, but McKinley just doesn’t sleep well alone. Some nights she ends up in our bed. Ok, most nights.

I won’t let her cry, even if everyone says she’s playing me. I did for one night, and yes, after 7 minutes she went back to sleep. But until she can tell me what her cries mean, why should I ignore them? Maybe she has nightmares. Maybe her mattress is uncomfortable. Maybe she has a belly ache. I don’t like to sleep alone, so I’m not sure why I make her.

The monitor lights up, I hear her little cry. Grab my glasses and my phone (Thank you, God, for smart phones), and I rescue her. When she cries out, I come to her. Gosh, I’m thankful to know what that feels like.

The days (and nights) are so long. But the years. They are flying by. Soon, this will be a memory. And as odd as it sounds, I don’t want to forget.

Our Weekend

I sat down on Thursday and drafted a blog post (first since JUNE!) about pretty much nothing, and the deleted it because it just didn't have any substance. Boy, how things can change in a day!

I decided to blog this ordeal so that I could share it with everyone who asks exactly what happened. It's not that I don't want to tell people, I just don't want to miss any details.

McKinley got hurt on Thursday night. She had just had a bath, and I was carrying her into her bedroom to get her dressed. We had just walked into her room when she literally jumped out of my arms. She jumped in over the top of my arm, and I tried to catch her by her legs, but I couldn't. She fell onto her faux hardwood/laminate floor and smacked her head hard on the floor. She started crying immediately, and I was hysterical. I ran her out to Aaron and asked him to hold her while I composed myself. By the time I went out to the living room to check on her, she was playing with Aaron, laughing and acting completely normal. I checked her pupils, felt the back of her head for a bump and found nothing. She and I slept in the living room on Thursday night so that I could monitor her incase she started vomiting. She ate and slept just like normal and got up on Friday morning at 7:30. She ate and played all morning long, and I kept feeling the back of her head for a bump and I never felt anything.

Around 1:00 pm, I sat down to nurse McKinley in hopes of getting her down for a nap. As I was playing with her hair, I noticed that her head was very soft on one side. I immediately freaked out, called her pediatrician and left a message with the nurse to have the Dr call me. In the meantime, I called Aunt Jen to come to our house and just help me stay calm. She suggested I pack my bag in case the pediatrician sent us to the hospital overnight, so I was able to get a bag for me and McKinley packed while she held McKinley, who, by the way, was still acting completely normal.

The pediatrician called and said to take McKinley straight to the ER because she wouldn't be able to tell anything without a CT Scan. We settled in at the ER and had an evaluation from the doctor, who then ordered the scan. They wanted her as still as possible without sedating her, so they wrapped her like a mummy and taped her head down to the table. I held onto her with all my might and sang as loud as I could to comfort her while they did the scan. Another one of my fabulous aunts, Heather, had come by with her kids and they were there for comfort and support and when the doctor came in with the results of the scan, I was so thrilled that they were there.

The Attending came in and said that the CT showed that McKinley had fractured her skull and had some bleeding, which is what caused the side of her head to be soft. They said they wanted to monitor her for a while to make sure things didn't get worse, but that they didn't have the facilities to do that. They then informed me that they would be transferring her to the University of Chicago, which made me nervous, but not terrified. The part where I became terrified is when they told me that they were air lifting her. At 5:00 pm on a Friday afternoon, the last place you want to be if you have a brain injury is stuck in traffic on the Skyway. Actually, I can't think of any time you'd want to be stuck in traffic on the Skyway, but hey, it's Chicago. What can you do.

So they called for the helicopter from Comer Childrens Hospital at the University of Chicago, and found that they would be there in 15 minutes. They had just enough time to get an IV started and do another CT Scan of her neck to check for any issues before they Life Flight crew arrived. During all of this, and I'm not sure of the details, my aunt contacted Aaron and my mom, and they were both on their way. I had our car, so my uncle was driving Aaron to the hospital, and my mom was on her way from Ohio. From phone call to car was 3 minutes, she threw some random things in a bag and flew out the door. She drove to my brother's house, where he jumped in and took over driving. Mimi was very shaken and it's probably best that she wasn't driving.

The Flight crew arrived and began doing their preparations. They went over her medical history and I had to sign papers allowing my 13 month old to be transported by helicopter. I know I cried, a lot, but I didn't really have time to freak out because they needed me to stay calm so that McKinley didn't get worked up. With a brain trauma, they wanted to keep her blood pressure as constant as possible, so my crying wasn't going to help at all.

Aaron arrived and came in the room to hug her, we kissed her and watched them strap her to the board to make sure her neck and head stayed stable for the flight. She was then wheeled out and placed in the ambulance, then driven to the helicopter. We gathered our things and went out to the car, watched for her to take off, and then left (note - takes 8 minutes to fly from Crown Point to UofC by helicopter. EIGHT. WHOA.). We had been advised to take our time because once she arrived, she was going to be met by a pedicatric trauma team, and they had a lot of tests to do before we would even be able to see her.

We didn't really waste any time, and it still took us over an hour to get there. When we arrived, she had just been transferred to an ER room and was waiting for us. They said that she screamed the entire time, and never calmed down until she saw us. I was so heartbroken to hear this, but it's one of those things you just have to do as a parent. Obviously, I asked if I could ride along and for liability reasons, I couldn't. I knew this, but they were taking my BABY! I had to ask. Just in case.


They gave us an update - she had no neck injury so she didn't need to wear a collar. They did a full body scan just to be sure she didn't have any other issues, and it came back clear. We waited in the ER for 2 hours before being transferred to the PICU open unit. My mom and brother showed up with my aunt and uncle and we were able to visit with them for a while before being transferred. By they time we got to our bed in the unit, visiting hours were over, so they came home. But it was so good to have someone there to comfort us. We were still so scared and unsure of what was to come.

She was NPO (couldn't eat/nurse) so getting her to sleep was going to be a struggle. {She was NPO just in case something happened to her and they needed to intubate. They also gave her anti-seizure meds and the side effects are nausea and vomiting, and if she vomited, they wanted to know that it wasn't from eating too much, or something I ate that affected her.} After holding her for hours and then trying to get her to sleep without nursing, the nurse suggested I lay her in the crib to see if she would settle down. She thought that thing was a jungle gym. She loved playing in there, but we were worried she would hit her head, so we had to wrap the bars in blankets.

She finally caved around 1:30 am and after not sleeping more than 30 minutes since 7:30 am, she fell asleep. I was able to transfer her to the crib and grab an hour of sleep. She woke up and I was again able to get her back down. At 4 am, the nurse had to wake her to check her pupils, and she thankfully went right back to sleep. Again at 6 am, they had to wake her, she was NOT PLEASED and she wanted them to know! After 20 minutes of fighting it, she went back to sleep. (Note the padded crib bars - haha)

Around 7:15, the Neurosurgery team came in and assessed her, called for another CT Scan, and removed the NPO order. I was thrilled to be able to nurse her back to sleep, but WAIT. Now that she's awake, lets draw blood and do the CT Scan and order breakfast for mom and dad and check all vitals and meet the new staff after shift change. And then the Social Worker showed up. I knew that she would be coming by, but it still hurt my heart a lot. She asked her routine questions, and watched Aaron and I interact with McKinley. She explained that anytime a child under age 2 comes in with an injury, they do the evaluation. She informed us that she would meet with the Child Abuse Doctor and they would discuss our case and get back to us. Around 9, I was able to finally nurse her and she went to sleep for about an hour. I left to go brush my teeth and try to pull myself together and she stopped by while I was gone, letting Aaron know that we were cleared.

(Don't get too bored - we get to leave soon!)

My mom and Aunt Jen showed up just as she was waking up. The PICU Attending came in and said that the CT Scan showed no change from yesterday, which is the best news in this situation. They wanted her to eat regular food and keep it down, perform a final examination on her, and see her put pressure on her legs. She was too annoyed to walk, but she put weight on her legs which was good enough! She ate some spaghetti, got it all over my mom and the floor, kept it down, and was released! The nurse came in to unhook BOTH IV's and all of the monitors she had to wear, and we were OUTTA THERE. We go back in one month to meet with the Pediatric Neurosurgeon to check on the fracture, which should heal on it's own. The blood should reabsorb, and as it does, the swelling will go down.

YOU carried me, us. YOU lifted us in prayer, thought about us, wished us well. Facebooked to your friends about us, tweeted us to your followers, activated your church prayer chain, sent texts to check in. You assured us everything would be okay. We are so incredibly thankful. I wish I could thank each one of you individually, but I don't even know where to start. I can only explain that the peace we felt was an answer to prayer. There is no other explaination for why I wasn't a complete basketcase the entire weekend.

***Questions that I just didn't know where to put: Why did they air lift her? Why couldn't they observe her at the local hospital? Because of her age and head trauma, they wanted to have her monitored every 2 hours through the night, followed by a CT Scan. IF the scan would have shown things getting worse, they would've had to transfer her anyhow. As a precautionary measure, they did it early on. Also, there is not a Pedicatric Neurosurgery department at the hospital, only a Neonatal Neuorosurgeon (5 times, fast. Go.)
Any other questions, or if something doesn't make sense, please let me know. I wanted to get it all down while it was fresh in my memory.

2010 In Review

1. What did you do in 2010 that you’d never done before?

Had an IV. Had a baby. Nursed. Nursed over a car seat in a moving car while McKinley stayed strapped in her seat. Nursed in a restaurant. Nursed in Target. Nursed in Meijer. Nursed in the mall. Babywore (?) Wore my baby. In my house. In the mall. All of the above mentioned stores. So many baby/McKinley/parenting related things I can’t even list. I can’t think of anything else. At least, that isn’t related to being a new mother.

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?


I didn’t make any, so YES! Good for me!

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?


Meet my daughter, McKinley:

My nephew, Asher:

My SIL had a baby girl, Abigail. And about 10 of my closest twitter buddies.

4. Did anyone close to you die?


Dear God, I wish this question didn’t exist. And I wish I could skip it. But 2010 wouldn’t have been the best and worst year of my life without questions #3 and #4.

My Uncle Jamey died on May 11th.

My father-in-law Rich died on May 24th.

To say that May, 2010 was the worst month of my life is an understatement.

I wasn’t able to fully grieve either of these losses until very recently, due to being 7 months pregnant at the time. I knew I needed to stay well for myself and for McKinley.

5. What countries did you visit?

None.


6. What would you like to have in 2011 that you lacked in 2010?

Patience, love towards others, financial security.

7. What dates from 2010 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

Tuesday, May 11

Monday, May 24

Friday, August 13, McKinley's Birthday!

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?


Having a baby, yo.

9. What was your biggest failure?

At the time, I felt like a failure for not being everything for Aaron after his dad’s passing. I now look back and realize that in that moment, I was everything I could be. I HAD to take care of myself for the sake of “the baby”. There were times that I could have, should have been more patient and understanding of his grief, and I wish I would have been. But I can’t change it.

And every year going forward, my biggest failure will be that I lived such a selfish life (read: massive debts) prior to becoming a mother, that I will have to allow someone else to care for McKinley while I work a full-time job. Ugh. My heart hurts.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

Only self-inflicted, you know, recovery from a c-section.

11. What was the best thing you bought?

Diapers, wipes, butt paste.

12. Where did most of your money go?

Diapers, wipes, butt paste. Actually, I’m sure it was to eating out. Which will change this year. Cause we have to pay for day care and stuff.

And repayment on Student Loans.

And my car payment. Come on, December 2011. Mama wants a mini-van.

13. What did you get really excited about?

Having a BABY!

Being a MOM!

CHRISTMAS!

14. What song will always remind you of 2010?

I don’t know.

15. Compared to this time last year, are you:


– happier or sadder? Both. Which is incredible and heartbreaking at the exact same time.

– thinner or fatter? Er, fatter.

– richer or poorer? :womp, womp: poorer

16. What do you wish you’d done more of?


Saved money. Ugh. Saved some freakin’ money.

17. What do you wish you’d done less of?


Spent money. I feel like this is getting boring and repetitive. How about, complained? Cried? I just feel like some of those complaints and tears were totally warranted. I’m such a Debby Downer.

18. How did you spend Christmas?

With our families, smiling through the first Christmas without our loved ones, and sharing the joy that everyone felt having McKinley present.

19. What was your favorite TV program?

How I Met Your Mother, Cupcake Wars, Desperate Housewives, The Biggest Loser

20. What were your favorite books of the year?

I mostly read books preparing me for motherhood, the titles of which I couldn’t tell you. And also “On The Night You Were Born”, which brings me to big, blubbering messy tears. Every time.

21. What was your favorite music from this year?


I am not enough of a seasoned musical lover to answer this correctly. I’d probably put down a song that actually came out in 2008.

22. What were your favorite films of the year?

Again, I am not a movie watcher. My favorite movies that I watched in 2010 were probably from 2009. Or earlier.

23. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

My birthday was on a Monday. I worked. Aaron and McKinley took me to Boston’s Pizza for lunch. I turned 29.

24. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

Heh. I love my daughter. She is the best gift I have ever received. Not having to work so that I could spend every day with her would have made my year immeasurably more satisfying.

25. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2010?

Maternity clothes. Followed by yoga pants.

26. What kept you sane?

I’m not. :wink:

27. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2010.


EVERY. BREATH. COUNTS. You never, EVER know when you will say “bye” to someone for the very last time. And also that being a mother is the single greatest thing/feeling/emotion/job in the entire world.

Zzzzooooommmmmmmm

My house is not clean. My sink is full. I've been wearing these jeans for 3 days. I could lie and tell you that I've got this motherhood thing down, that I am able to wash dishes while breastfeeding McKinley in the sling. But I don't do that.

Right now, I work full-time. McKinley gets wonderful care from her dad, and he has nicknamed his job "Karing for Kinley". He sings songs from the Mickey Mouse Club and Handy Manny, and he's gotten good at putting together a bottle with one hand. When I get home from work each night, I just want to hold my girl. I probably could wash dishes and do laundry and vacuum while wearing Kiki in the sling, or just in my arms, but I don't want to.

********************************

McKinley turned 3 months old last Saturday. I can't quite figure out where the last 3 months have gone. I don't remember what life was like without her. I know that sounds so cliche but I really mean it.

She sits in her Bebe Pod and holds her head up for about 10 minutes at a time. She lays on her play mat and swats at the toys hanging down. She sleeps like a champ.

She loves her fingers, mostly her middle and ring finger. They are in her mouth most of the time and she drools all over the place.

Last night, I saw two little teeth, anxious to make their arrival.

My baby is growing up. And it's going by so. fast.

Each night, I wash just enough dishes to get through the next day. Usually, this means pump parts and bottles. And I wear my pants for multiple days because I don't want to spend hours in the laundry room and risk missing a single thing.

{Don't tell, but they're more comfortable after a couple of days anyhow.}

McKinley's 3rd month

The Story of Us

McKinley,

The story of how you joined our family is incredible and miraculous and beautiful and I would do it again a million times to have you sleeping beside me right now, and for the last 8 weeks. This is our story.

On Monday, August 9, 2010 (8/9/10) I went to my OB for my 40 week appointment. The nurse checked me out and found that I wasn't dilated, so the doctor wouldn't be able to sweep my membranes or do anything to encourage labor. He told me to come back on Thursday, and that we would discuss an induction if I hadn't made any changes.

Daddy took the day off of work on Thursday to go with me to the doctor, and we got to listen to your little heartbeat during a non-stress test for almost 30 minutes. That sound was so beautiful to my ears.

The nurse checked me after the non-stress test, and found that I was still not dilated. She called my doctor, who allowed for me to be induced that evening. My doctor lives in a different town than the hospital I wanted to have you at, and suggested the hospital by his house, so that he could be there in time for your arrival. I agreed, but as soon as we got out to the car, I started crying that it wasn't what I had wanted! So your dad called the doctor back and said that we were going to the hospital I wanted to have you at, the hospital where you were born.

We went out to lunch at TGIFridays, and then went home and tried to take a nap. I couldn't sleep because I was so excited to finally meet you!

Our induction was scheduled to begin that night, Thursday, August 12, 2010 at 10pm. We found a parking spot, and daddy helped me carry all of my things into the hospital. It must've looked like we were moving in. I had a bag for you and one for me, my computer, my camera, and a few pillows. I overpack. All. The. Time.

I was given a medicine called Cervadil at 10pm to soften my cervix. It was left in for 12 hours, and on Friday morning, I was started on Pitocin, which would hopefully cause me go to into labor. I walked the halls of the hospital with our doula and friend Rachel, I bounced on the birthing ball, I visited with Daddy and Mimi and Aunt Paytie. I was having some mild discomfort, but certainly not contractions, and certainly not anything painful.

At 4pm on Friday afternoon, my doctor came to check on me. He assessed me, and found that not only was I still not dilated, but that my cervix was still very hard. He then ordered an ultrasound so that we could see how big you were. It would be the last time I would see you on the screen. I cry just thinking about that time, where it was still just you and me and I didn't have to share you with the world.

And this is where I made a decision that I do not regret, but I know that some of my friends will find weird, even appalling.

My doctor told me that he would allow me to labor for 24 more hours, with the pitocin and lots of walking, and we could hope for things to progress on their own. Or, he would do a c-section that evening. And I chose the c-section.

So the nurse gave Daddy some scrubs, and I got ready to meet you. I was taken to the operating room, and the nurses there were incredible. I was crying while they were getting me ready to meet you, not because I was scared, but because I couldn't believe that I would be holding you soon. They brought Daddy into the room and he sat beside me and held my hand. Just a few minutes later, the doctor said "Look at all that hair!" I couldn't believe what I was hearing! I said "My baby? My baby has hair??" and they all sorta laughed because of course he was talking about my baby. He was talking about you.

The nurse brought you over to me right away and I was able to kiss you and tell you how much I loved you and how I couldn't believe that you were finally here! Daddy was crying and Mommy was crying and it was your birthday! You were born at 6:14pm on 8/13/2010, weighing 8lbs., 2oz., and measuring 18 inches long.

Friday the 13th, 2010. The luckiest day of my life.

Daddy went with you to the nursery and helped the nurse weigh and measure you and give you your first bath. When I got back to our room, they brought you right to me. I cried and cried and talked to you and told you how much I loved you. I put you to my breast and gave you your first meal and it was beautiful and incredible. Mimi was there, and Aunt Payton, and Grandma Sonnie. They held you and loved on you, and then they left and our little family stayed behind and got to know each other. It was amazing.


And here we are, 8 weeks later. And there are so many words I would use to describe this time. Beautiful and incredible and breathtaking. We have learned how to be a family of three. We have discovered that our love for you knows no bounds. We have watched you smile and learn to "coo" and find your fingers and flail your arms and legs about. We have a wonderful breastfeeding relationship.

You've been to Ohio twice, stayed in a hotel, and been to a Toledo (Mommy's team!) and Purdue (Daddy's team!) football game. (They were playing each other. It was a win-win situation.)

Our memories are just beginning, baby girl. And we can't wait to make millions more! McKinley, you will never, ever know how much Mommy & Daddy love you.

This is our story.

Ette

We’d gone back and forth, back and forth on a name and middle name for Tiny Dancer.

We had a name picked out, and then found out she was a girl, and our favorite girl name wasn’t our favorite anymore.

We looked at websites and books that Aaron claims were not created for people with normal baby names (we actually saw the name “Baby” listed as a girl’s name) and then threw the books on the floor and gave up.

And then one day, it just came to me. I loved it and he loved it and we loved the way it sounds with our last name and SHE HAD A FIRST NAME!

But she needed a middle name that fit with her first and last name and that also met the qualifications for middle-naming-a-girl on my mom’s side of the family. The tradition is for each of us to have a middle name that ends in “ette” and if you follow me on Twitter or know my email address, you’ve probably figured by now that my middle name is Janette. My mom is Lynette, my sister is Yvette and my aunts and cousins are Suzette’s and Collette’s and Danette’s and lots of things in-between.

{In order, from my oldest aunt to my youngest cousin: Annette, Lynette, Suzette, Collette, Mynette, Janette, Lynette, Yvette, Annette, Danette, Colette} (Yes, there are repeats. Some are after their own mother, others are named after an aunt.)

Aaron's mom's middle name is Lynn and since my mom's middle name is Lynette, it made sense that our daughter's middle name would be Lynette.

But you know that her middle name isn't Lynette.

Aaron called me one afternoon and suggested the name "Jolette". He had talked with his dad about how my family had the "ette" tradition but he wanted it to be unique, something that no other female had already. Aaron's dad suggested Jolette, which incorporated the "ette" and Aaron's middle name, Joel.

I admit, I wasn't immediately in love with it, mostly because I wanted us to name our daughter and not have influence from someone else. This is part of the reason I didn't want to tell anyone her name before she was born.

Aaron's dad passed away a couple of weeks later.

He'd known our daughter as McKinley Jolette.

We didn't really even talk about her name after that. I just knew that it would be so important to Aaron that we used the name his dad suggested.


And so she is.

It fits her perfectly, our sweet Kinley Jo.

one month.

mckinley turned one month old yesterday.

i don't have adequate words for the feelings i experience every time i look at our daughter.

has it been one month already?

the only postpartum depression i've experienced is knowing that i have to go back to work. i'm not making light of postpartum depression, i'm being serious. i can't stand that i have to go to work and be away from my best girlfriend. we have a pretty good deal, though, and she'll be able to go to work with me for the first couple weeks i'm back. then daddy will be home with her during the winter because his job is seasonal. when he goes back to work in march, we'll have to figure something out, but i can't live in anticipation of that time. i have to enjoy this time, and be thankful for this day.

i should probably write out her birth story so i don't forget any details. and i need to tell you the story behind her name. but for now, i want to look at her while she sleeps on my lap. and i need to go fill up my cookie bowl.

The way she smells.

I cannot hold her close enough, smell her enough, kiss her enough. She smells like sweet milk and the things that heaven must surely be made of. Her cheeks are soft and thick, her eyes dark like the night.

I lift her to my shoulder, she turns her head in toward my neck, and I wonder if she knows that this makes me weak in the knees.

She is my sweet little princess, my best friend.

Our birth story is just how it was intended to be, exactly what I wanted. I got a baby at the end. And I might be biased, but I think she's pretty much the most beautiful baby in the whole world. Her daddy thinks so too.

McKinley Jolette

8lbs, 2oz., 18 inches (My little peanut)

We are in love.